Saturday 15 November 2008
There isn't much to blog about these days, no pictures, so I shall share some of my thoughts today. I'm not in the mood to write properly so it might sound very boring, be warned.
Lately I've been thinking quite a bit about my relationship with friends. I found myself often giving advices to friends and people I know .. you know, those typical advice like, calm down, don't get angry before you find out the thruth and don't wrongly accuse people, work hard, study hard, you will regret it later, don't waste too much time doing unproductive stuff etc; all the advice that makes me sound like a cranky old man.
I know that I myself am not perfect, and still do all those stuff I spoke of. However, I welcome advice from others. Although I might felt aggrieved or slighted by unexpected comments, when I calm down I tend to think carefully about what they said and try to follow the advice, most of the time. (actually that brings me to another topic... always thinking about other ppls' advice hence lack of confidence but i shall leave it for next time)
So anyways, I kept asking myself.. is that the right thing to do?
On one point of view, they are your friends and they would definitely love you to accept them as what they are. Usually, ppl who share common characteristics find it easier to get close to each other. What I do might be pushing ppl away. I know the feeling of getting like 20 advice everytime i talk to someone.... it kind of kills the conversation. Further, not everyone can truly comprehend the advice. If you've experienced the consequences you will understand the advice. Otherwise.. it's just... so.... hard......
On another hand, occasionally I do feel very strongly and feel that I have to speak out. Although I do try to keep in mind that everyone are different and have different way of thinking, some actions or intents are so against what I think is right I can't help but to say something. Worst, I give lots of advice to my friends for their sake.. just like what parents do XD. It's not good to do that.. it's good for you if you do this..... But it's all out of wanting the best for them.
Sadness.
Why am I acting this way!?
WHYYY
Any thoughts on this?
3 comments:
ah ha! now comes my ADVICE LOL!.
Ok ok. Now, when people talk to you, at 65 ~ 75% of the time, they can actually sort out the problems themselves, especially the girls.
So, why did they find you then? They just want to rant it (both guys and girls). You need not give advice, perhaps just some own opinion will do. Your job here is to listening using your eyes only. Sad to say, but yeah.
Now, what happened to the 25 ~ 35% of people? These are the people whom you should let them do a lot of talking. Your job here is to ASK THE RIGHT, CRITICAL questions. Like, try to find out what is the thing that they want to hear from you.
These are the people who needs sort of mentality supports. They might have a solution but they are asking if it's feasible. At most time again, it's not. However, don't throw it in their face just like that. You have to, and need to make them understand in other way. On the other hand, if that particular person is MinSoon, hell yeah screw him in the face.
Haha! Is my comment longer than you post or not? I think not. @.@
Good luck dude.
hmm i see i see... valuable advice.
Thanks thanks... yea.. sadly man.
Cuz when I think of one thing, I don't like saying another thing.. it's clearly lying.. so i have a dilema when that happens. For example in a scenario (i usually ask questions before giving advice) I feel that my friend is wrong, not the other party but my firend is damn angry... I know he wants me to confort him but... it's clearly my friend's fault... I will feel hard to comfort that person, unless he's like really emotional about it at that moment.
LOL when I first saw your comment i thought that was my post!
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